It's time for me to finally share this with you...I've avoided posting about this because I had a lot of false hope and was really let down.
For the past month and a half, I thought I was pregnant. But, as I found out Saturday...I'm not.
I was so excited and had already thought about how I was going to change our spare room into the nursery. I had already thought about the finish of the crib and the rest of the furniture. I was looking forward to traveling to the beach this summer and having my big belly and enjoying every moment of it.
The back story - I posted back in September that I was going off the pill...and I did. Life has been marvelous since then. My mood swings have decreased and I've not been so down-in-the-dumps. We aren't actively trying to have a child, but I can't really say that we're doing much to prevent it.
Anyway...I haven't had my period in 2 months, so I took a HPT 2 weeks ago...it was negative. But, I knew that annual appointment was coming up with Dr. Stever, so I figured I would talk to him about it. So, I did...he gave me a script for blood work and told me that depending on what the lab said, if I wasn't pregnant he would have to put me on meds to help me ovulate...which would be why I hadn't gotten my period in 2 months.
I went last Monday and had the blood drawn and waited the whole week to hear from Dr. Stever. He called me on Saturday night and told me that the blood tests were also negative for pregnancy. I was crushed!!!! It wasn't enough that the HPT was negative, but to hear the doctor say it made it even worse for me. What he did tell me is that my Thyroid levels were a little high and that I would have to have the blood work repeated.
Did I mention that I HATE needles?!?!
So...today I went and blood drawn again...now it'll be a waiting game to hear from him. I'm either going to have to go on medication to help me ovulate...or to lower my Thyroid levels.
And I know what you're thinking..."It'll happen when it's supposed to happen." I know that, but that's not what I wanted to hear from anyone. I wish someone would've said, it's okay to be angry, sad, and everything else that I was feeling. One of the girls at work said that she didn't think I was ready to have kids yet...but we've been together for 6 years and yes, I am ready.
I hope you understand why I couldn't share what was going on with me...I spent the past 2 months looking forward to something that I can't have yet because my body isn't working right. And I know it's going to be a few more months until we can think about trying because it'll take a while for the drugs to work. When I hear from Dr. Stever again, I'll let you know what my real problem is...and what the next step is so that we can have a little one sometime soon.
Showing posts with label babies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label babies. Show all posts
3.09.2009
2.05.2009
25 Random Things...about me
So this thing is all over Facebook...The idea is that if someone does it, they tag you and make you do it, too. Then you tag someone else. Well, I was tagged 5 times and it took me a week to do it, but I finished it tonight. So I thought I would post it here too...since I haven't posted in nearly a week. Happy reading
1. I dislike the color purple. I refused to wear it, with one exception. And that was for AJ and Brad's wedding, in Hawaii.
2. I'm a substitute teacher for 2 school districts, Westmont Hilltop in Johnstown, and Penns Manor. I love working with the kids, and that I can be with a different group of them everyday if I decide...but I'd rather have my own classroom.
3. When I'm not subbing, I work at AmbCoach...it's an ambulance billing company. Basically, if you take an ambulance we get your insurance information and bill your insurance company. It's pretty boring, but it pays my bills.
4. I want to be a mom in the worst way. Too bad Bobby isn't ready, cause we have a spare room that would make a perfect nursery :)
5. I have the names of my children picked out already. Don't ask me what they are...that's TOP SECRET!
6. I'm worried that I won't be able to have my own kids...my mom wasn't supposed to be able to have children, and her doctor told her it would never happen. Well, obviously that didn't happen...but what if it does to me?!
7. I don't have the best relationship with my parents. I think it's because they both worked so much when we were younger and I didn't get to spend enough time with them...I do try to talk to my mom everyday...even if it's for 2 minutes. At least we're trying.
8. I have a baby brother. We aren't really that close either. I wish I could change that, but we're just totally different people and have busy lives, so it makes things hard.
9. Unlike most people...I get along really well with my mother-in-law. She's awesome!
10. My sisters-in-law are awesome too. I couldn't ever ask for two better sisters or friends.
11. I have a scar on my chin from when I was 2. I fell between two stairs on a sliding board and landed on a platform...chin first. I cracked my chin open and all of my molars were cracked, too. I had most of them pulled and had 10 stitches in my chin.
12. I like to make jewelry. I've made a few pieces after I took a class in Arizona over Thanksgiving. I really enjoy it...and thought maybe I'd try selling some pieces eventually.
13. I like to take pictures. I wish I knew how to better use the settings on my camera to get the image I want.
14. My niece, Taryne, is the coolest kid ever. End of story.
15. I still have a dollar bill that's tied into a knot from the bridal dance at our reception. I found it in the bottom of my purse today. I knew it was there...I only have it because I can't get it untied...and we found it in the couch the week we moved into our new house.
16. I carry a leatherman/multi tool from Cabelas around in my purse. Because you never know when you're gong to need needle nose pliers, a knife, screwdriver, or a flashlight! I used it today to fix the zipper pull on my winter coat.
17. I don't sleep well...it takes me hours to fall asleep every night. Of course, to make up for the fact that I fall asleep around 3 am, I sleep until 10...unless I have to sub in the morning.
18. I'm addicted to blogging. I read them everyday...and yes, I have one. I update it at least once a week.
19. Before I die, I want to go to Spain.
20. I listen to a lot of different genres of music. I thank my parents for that.
21. I like to watch TV. I always watch Food Network, HGTV, pretty much everything on ABC, Don't Forget the Lyrics and CASH CAB! **** And yes, I can't forget Lingo. Thanks Teri ****
22. I LOVE to cook. I like to try new recipes, as long as Bobby will eat whatever it is I make...he's really picky though.
23. When I was in Jr. and Sr. High, I had a crush on Bobby's best friends. I didn't even know him then...but they were all in our wedding.
24. Planning our wedding was super stressful, but I'd do it all over again because it was so much fun. I was actually kinda sad that it was over. I miss having something to plan for.
25. I bite my nails and pick at my cuticles. It's a bad habit, but I can't help it.
1. I dislike the color purple. I refused to wear it, with one exception. And that was for AJ and Brad's wedding, in Hawaii.
2. I'm a substitute teacher for 2 school districts, Westmont Hilltop in Johnstown, and Penns Manor. I love working with the kids, and that I can be with a different group of them everyday if I decide...but I'd rather have my own classroom.
3. When I'm not subbing, I work at AmbCoach...it's an ambulance billing company. Basically, if you take an ambulance we get your insurance information and bill your insurance company. It's pretty boring, but it pays my bills.
4. I want to be a mom in the worst way. Too bad Bobby isn't ready, cause we have a spare room that would make a perfect nursery :)
5. I have the names of my children picked out already. Don't ask me what they are...that's TOP SECRET!
6. I'm worried that I won't be able to have my own kids...my mom wasn't supposed to be able to have children, and her doctor told her it would never happen. Well, obviously that didn't happen...but what if it does to me?!
7. I don't have the best relationship with my parents. I think it's because they both worked so much when we were younger and I didn't get to spend enough time with them...I do try to talk to my mom everyday...even if it's for 2 minutes. At least we're trying.
8. I have a baby brother. We aren't really that close either. I wish I could change that, but we're just totally different people and have busy lives, so it makes things hard.
9. Unlike most people...I get along really well with my mother-in-law. She's awesome!
10. My sisters-in-law are awesome too. I couldn't ever ask for two better sisters or friends.
11. I have a scar on my chin from when I was 2. I fell between two stairs on a sliding board and landed on a platform...chin first. I cracked my chin open and all of my molars were cracked, too. I had most of them pulled and had 10 stitches in my chin.
12. I like to make jewelry. I've made a few pieces after I took a class in Arizona over Thanksgiving. I really enjoy it...and thought maybe I'd try selling some pieces eventually.
13. I like to take pictures. I wish I knew how to better use the settings on my camera to get the image I want.
14. My niece, Taryne, is the coolest kid ever. End of story.
15. I still have a dollar bill that's tied into a knot from the bridal dance at our reception. I found it in the bottom of my purse today. I knew it was there...I only have it because I can't get it untied...and we found it in the couch the week we moved into our new house.
16. I carry a leatherman/multi tool from Cabelas around in my purse. Because you never know when you're gong to need needle nose pliers, a knife, screwdriver, or a flashlight! I used it today to fix the zipper pull on my winter coat.
17. I don't sleep well...it takes me hours to fall asleep every night. Of course, to make up for the fact that I fall asleep around 3 am, I sleep until 10...unless I have to sub in the morning.
18. I'm addicted to blogging. I read them everyday...and yes, I have one. I update it at least once a week.
19. Before I die, I want to go to Spain.
20. I listen to a lot of different genres of music. I thank my parents for that.
21. I like to watch TV. I always watch Food Network, HGTV, pretty much everything on ABC, Don't Forget the Lyrics and CASH CAB! **** And yes, I can't forget Lingo. Thanks Teri ****
22. I LOVE to cook. I like to try new recipes, as long as Bobby will eat whatever it is I make...he's really picky though.
23. When I was in Jr. and Sr. High, I had a crush on Bobby's best friends. I didn't even know him then...but they were all in our wedding.
24. Planning our wedding was super stressful, but I'd do it all over again because it was so much fun. I was actually kinda sad that it was over. I miss having something to plan for.
25. I bite my nails and pick at my cuticles. It's a bad habit, but I can't help it.
1.21.2009
Looooooooong day.
Today I spent my day with fourteen 5 and 6 year-olds, teaching kindergarten. Wow. I love those kids. They are so trusting and untainted by most things in this world. I never really thought about their age in comparison to mine before today. Most of those kids were born in 2003 or 2004. I was in my sophomore year of college when they were born.
One little boy, Domminic, (who I love, love, love!) was telling me that his dad was coming home today from Iraq. He was so excited that his dad was coming home. He doesn't even know why his dad is in Iraq, he wasn't even alive at the start of this war to be able to comprehend why his dad is away from him, fighting for our freedom. Thank you Domminic's dad for what you do for us, we are so fortunate to have others, like you, willing to fight for us. God bless you.
As I sat at my desk tooday, watching the kids play during recess, I thought to myself that I really do want to have kids. These kids were just so heart warming. They randomly hugged me and surprised me all day at how smart and sweet they are. Don't get my wrong, they all have their moments when they test your patience. There were a few kids that are obviously an only child or an older sibling because they take control of things, or some kids that have problems following directs because they are easily distracted. But they are actually good kids when you can get them under control. I don't know how anyone could not want kids if they spent the day with the 14 kids I had in my room today.
After school, I went to the office to work. While there, one of the other ladies I work with was staying late to make up some time. We wound up talking the entire time we were both there, just venting about various things in our lives. I think it was something we both needed, because I left feeling much better about things. I guess I just needed the adult conversation after being with the kids all day.
I got home around 7:45, and Bobby actually cooked dinner for me! I was so excited. Even though it was only spaghetti and deer tenderloin, I didn't have to cook it, so it was great! Now we're both just relaxing for the rest of the night before bed. I need to get some stuff done around the house, but I'm way too tired to even think about dusting or vaccuuming. I just want to relax.
Time to make some hot tea and relax. Night all!
One little boy, Domminic, (who I love, love, love!) was telling me that his dad was coming home today from Iraq. He was so excited that his dad was coming home. He doesn't even know why his dad is in Iraq, he wasn't even alive at the start of this war to be able to comprehend why his dad is away from him, fighting for our freedom. Thank you Domminic's dad for what you do for us, we are so fortunate to have others, like you, willing to fight for us. God bless you.
As I sat at my desk tooday, watching the kids play during recess, I thought to myself that I really do want to have kids. These kids were just so heart warming. They randomly hugged me and surprised me all day at how smart and sweet they are. Don't get my wrong, they all have their moments when they test your patience. There were a few kids that are obviously an only child or an older sibling because they take control of things, or some kids that have problems following directs because they are easily distracted. But they are actually good kids when you can get them under control. I don't know how anyone could not want kids if they spent the day with the 14 kids I had in my room today.
After school, I went to the office to work. While there, one of the other ladies I work with was staying late to make up some time. We wound up talking the entire time we were both there, just venting about various things in our lives. I think it was something we both needed, because I left feeling much better about things. I guess I just needed the adult conversation after being with the kids all day.
I got home around 7:45, and Bobby actually cooked dinner for me! I was so excited. Even though it was only spaghetti and deer tenderloin, I didn't have to cook it, so it was great! Now we're both just relaxing for the rest of the night before bed. I need to get some stuff done around the house, but I'm way too tired to even think about dusting or vaccuuming. I just want to relax.
Time to make some hot tea and relax. Night all!
1.19.2009
A little bit of life...
It's hard to believe, but we've been married for 6 months as of today. I can't believe how quickly the time has passed. It seems like the wedding was such a long time ago. We've had a lot of change in 6 months, including moving to our new house. I can only imagine that things will get better for us, and hopefully we'll be bringing a child into our lives soon, which will only make things change more.
I had a dream the other night that we had to ask my dad to watch our little girl, Hannah. We were going out for something and we stopped at my parents house and my dad was home, so we left Hannah with him. That's all I remember from the dream. Maybe it was just that my heart and my brain were working together and my wishes were coming true...at least in my dreams. Hannah is the name my dad had picked out for me, but my mom wanted Sarah, so she won. I now like the name Hannah...I just don't want my child to be called "Hannah Montana," EVER!
We're sitting here tonight watching Paranormal State on A&E, and being freaked out by all of these "haunted" places and spirits. Right now they're doing a thing on a haunted piano. I never really used to believe in this stuff, but I think I do now. I'm supposed to be getting ready for bed, since I'm teaching in the morning. But of course, as always, I'm not tired.
So back to dinner on Friday with Sara and Tyson. I made the meatballs and the potatoes with green beans and dinner turned out AWESOME! Sara and Tyson really liked it, and Bobby actually ate it. He seemed to like it and didn't use his "It's not something I would crave" line...which means he might actually eat it again. I can always tell when he doesn't like something that I've made, or someone else made when he says "It's not something I would crave."
Thanks Toni for the "go suck a fart" insult. I loved that and I may be using it sometime soon.
The STEELERS are going to the SUPER BOWL after beating up on the Ravens. Check out Teri's great pictures from the game HERE. She always take such amazing pictures and these are no exception. If she gets to go to the Super Bowl, I'll be incredibly jealous!!
It has snowed here for the past week and a half and I'm tired of it. I wish that it would just warm up, or we could go away to somewhere warm. I was looking at vacation destinations online yesterday but nothing caught my interest. I want just the two of us to go away somewhere warm and sunny. I just want to lay on the beach and get some sun on my pasty white skin. Other than our honeymoon, we've never had a vacation of our own. We went to Hawaii in March, but that was for a friend's wedding. So we weren't on our own. I'd gladly take any suggestions, if anyone has any. I'd like to stay on the East Coast if possible, we don't really have the money to fly anywhere.
So please, if you're reading this, leave me a suggestion as to where we should go on vacation.
Well, I best head to bed. I'm sure the elementary students will be wild tomorrow, so I've gotta get some rest to keep up with them! Goodnight.
I had a dream the other night that we had to ask my dad to watch our little girl, Hannah. We were going out for something and we stopped at my parents house and my dad was home, so we left Hannah with him. That's all I remember from the dream. Maybe it was just that my heart and my brain were working together and my wishes were coming true...at least in my dreams. Hannah is the name my dad had picked out for me, but my mom wanted Sarah, so she won. I now like the name Hannah...I just don't want my child to be called "Hannah Montana," EVER!
We're sitting here tonight watching Paranormal State on A&E, and being freaked out by all of these "haunted" places and spirits. Right now they're doing a thing on a haunted piano. I never really used to believe in this stuff, but I think I do now. I'm supposed to be getting ready for bed, since I'm teaching in the morning. But of course, as always, I'm not tired.
So back to dinner on Friday with Sara and Tyson. I made the meatballs and the potatoes with green beans and dinner turned out AWESOME! Sara and Tyson really liked it, and Bobby actually ate it. He seemed to like it and didn't use his "It's not something I would crave" line...which means he might actually eat it again. I can always tell when he doesn't like something that I've made, or someone else made when he says "It's not something I would crave."
Thanks Toni for the "go suck a fart" insult. I loved that and I may be using it sometime soon.
The STEELERS are going to the SUPER BOWL after beating up on the Ravens. Check out Teri's great pictures from the game HERE. She always take such amazing pictures and these are no exception. If she gets to go to the Super Bowl, I'll be incredibly jealous!!
It has snowed here for the past week and a half and I'm tired of it. I wish that it would just warm up, or we could go away to somewhere warm. I was looking at vacation destinations online yesterday but nothing caught my interest. I want just the two of us to go away somewhere warm and sunny. I just want to lay on the beach and get some sun on my pasty white skin. Other than our honeymoon, we've never had a vacation of our own. We went to Hawaii in March, but that was for a friend's wedding. So we weren't on our own. I'd gladly take any suggestions, if anyone has any. I'd like to stay on the East Coast if possible, we don't really have the money to fly anywhere.
So please, if you're reading this, leave me a suggestion as to where we should go on vacation.
Well, I best head to bed. I'm sure the elementary students will be wild tomorrow, so I've gotta get some rest to keep up with them! Goodnight.
11.11.2008
An update.
My computer still is not working...go figure. I did however, get my computer to connect to the internet today, so there's still hope for it. At least I have access to one at work, but I try not to do too much personal computing while I'm here. But, it's a slow afternoon, and there was no mail today, so I'm updating!
Our friends got married last Saturday, the 1st. The wedding was beautiful, I definitely cried!
I got some great photos of all of us together, especially of the goofy guys. Maybe if my computer is still working when I get home tonight, I'll give posting some a try.
We had an excellent time and got to spend some time with our closest friends who have moved out of state. It was good to see everyone, and while we were all extremely emotional, I think it was exactly what we needed. JohnAllen & Diana are still living in Kentucky and they are trying desperately to get home. Jeff is still in LA and I'm thinking he's about ready to come back to the eastern part of the country, too. We know he doesn't want to come back to Indiana, but it would be nice to have him a little closer to us, even if it is DC. We can always visit!
Diana called last night, she started asking when we were going to give her a niece or nephew. I told her I would do what I can, but it's not completely up to me :) I told her she had Cooper - Ben & Erika's little one - but she said that isn't enough. She said it was up to me, or she was going to start hounding Anna next.
On another note, we talked to a psychic on Sunday. I talked to her almost exactly 2 years ago and she is very interesting. She told me that we would be moving into a house in about 6-8 months. She told Bobby that our move would be locally, as our "roots run too deep in this area."
Not that I'm taking her word as the absolute truth, but it kind of gives us something to look forward to.
Our friends got married last Saturday, the 1st. The wedding was beautiful, I definitely cried!
I got some great photos of all of us together, especially of the goofy guys. Maybe if my computer is still working when I get home tonight, I'll give posting some a try.
We had an excellent time and got to spend some time with our closest friends who have moved out of state. It was good to see everyone, and while we were all extremely emotional, I think it was exactly what we needed. JohnAllen & Diana are still living in Kentucky and they are trying desperately to get home. Jeff is still in LA and I'm thinking he's about ready to come back to the eastern part of the country, too. We know he doesn't want to come back to Indiana, but it would be nice to have him a little closer to us, even if it is DC. We can always visit!
Diana called last night, she started asking when we were going to give her a niece or nephew. I told her I would do what I can, but it's not completely up to me :) I told her she had Cooper - Ben & Erika's little one - but she said that isn't enough. She said it was up to me, or she was going to start hounding Anna next.
On another note, we talked to a psychic on Sunday. I talked to her almost exactly 2 years ago and she is very interesting. She told me that we would be moving into a house in about 6-8 months. She told Bobby that our move would be locally, as our "roots run too deep in this area."
Not that I'm taking her word as the absolute truth, but it kind of gives us something to look forward to.
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